The Parenting 3.0 Show
Helping Relationships - Part 3: The Ten Characteristics (6-10)

Helping Relationships - Part 3: The Ten Characteristics (6-10)

January 16, 2020

This week, Jai and Deb continue to explore the work of Carl Rogers, diving even deeper into the topic of helping relationships, which Rogers defines as relationships that "other people can use for their own personal growth."

In this episode we discuss the second five out of ten characteristics that Rogers identifies as essential to supporting personal growth in others. These five characteristics are:

6) Understanding

7) Acceptance

8) Safety

9) Non-evaluation

10) Confirmation

Join us as we discover together how to form powerful helping relationships!

Links we mentioned (or should have) in this episode:

 

STAY CONNECTED WITH DEB & JAI:

Like the Parenting 3.0 Podcast Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/parenting3podcast/

And find them on their websites: https://LifeWorks.life and https://DebBlum.com

The Parenting 3.0 Show is a weekly long-form discussion aimed at helping to make parenting more effective and enjoyable for parents and more beneficial for kids.

Helping Relationships - Part 2: The Ten Characteristics (1-5)

Helping Relationships - Part 2: The Ten Characteristics (1-5)

January 9, 2020

This week, Jai and Deb continue to explore the work of Carl Rogers, diving even deeper into the topic of helping relationships, which Rogers defines as relationships that "other people can use for their own personal growth."

In this episode we discuss the first five out of ten characteristics that Rogers identifies as essential to supporting personal growth in another person. The first five characteristics are:

1) Dependability

2) Congruence

3) Positive Regard

4) Healthy Separateness for Oneself

5) Healthy Separateness for the Other

Join us as we discover together how to form powerful helping relationships!

Links we mentioned (or should have) in this episode:

 

STAY CONNECTED WITH DEB & JAI:

Like the Parenting 3.0 Podcast Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/parenting3podcast/

And find them on their websites: https://LifeWorks.life and https://DebBlum.com

The Parenting 3.0 Show is a weekly long-form discussion aimed at helping to make parenting more effective and enjoyable for parents and more beneficial for kids.

Helping Relationships - Part 1: Supporting Self-Actualization

Helping Relationships - Part 1: Supporting Self-Actualization

January 1, 2020

This week, Jai and Deb discuss how to support the process of Self-Actualization in our kids. Using the groundbreaking work of psychologist Carl Rogers as a framework, we explore topics such as authenticity, unconditional love and the power of understanding.

We also explore how to form what Rogers calls helping relationships, which he defines as those relationships that "another person can use for his or her own personal growth." Rogers' three key insights into helping relationships are as follows:

1) The more that we can be genuine in a relationship, the more helpful it will be.

2) The more acceptance and liking we feel toward the other person, the more we will be creating a relationship that the other person can use for their own personal growth.

3) The more that we strive to understand the other person, the more we hold a sensitive empathy toward that person's feelings and communications, the more helpful and significant it will be.

When these three conditions are present, individuals naturally move in the direction of wholeness, maturity and self-actualization.

Links we mentioned (or should have) in this episode:

 

STAY CONNECTED WITH DEB & JAI:

Like the Parenting 3.0 Podcast Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/parenting3podcast/

And find them on their websites: https://LifeWorks.life and https://DebBlum.com

The Parenting 3.0 Show is a weekly long-form discussion aimed at helping to make parenting more effective and enjoyable for parents and more beneficial for kids.

Listener Question: How to Handle Separation Anxiety

Listener Question: How to Handle Separation Anxiety

December 25, 2019

This week, Deb and Jai try something new where they respond to a question from a listener. The topic is separation anxiety and they use attachment theory as the basis for their answer. This was recorded using Zoom video conferencing and will be posted on YouTube too! 

We'd love to know what you think about this format, and if you have a question for us - please reach out. You can email us at deb@inspire4life.com or jai@lifeworks.life

Links we mentioned (or should have) in this episode:
 
STAY CONNECTED WITH DEB & JAI:
 
Like the Parenting 3.0 Podcast Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/parenting3podcast/
And find them on their websites: https://LifeWorks.life and https://DebBlum.com
 
The Parenting 3.0 Show is a weekly long-form discussion aimed at helping to make parenting more effective and enjoyable for parents and more beneficial for kids.

 

 

Self-Determination Theory - Part 4: Beyond Rewards and Punishments

Self-Determination Theory - Part 4: Beyond Rewards and Punishments

December 18, 2019

This week, Jai and Deb finish mapping out the Motivation Continuum that we started discussing in Part 3 of this series, focusing on the four types of extrinsic motivation. Downloading the PDF of this continuum may be helpful. Join us as we explore the hidden costs of using rewards and punishments and what it looks like to move beyond that to more integrated forms of extrinsic motivation. 

Links we mentioned (or should have) in this episode:

The Motivation Continuum

NY Times Article: Which is Better, Rewards or Punishments? Neither

STAY CONNECTED WITH DEB & JAI:

Like the Parenting 3.0 Podcast Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/parenting3podcast/

And find them on their websites: https://LifeWorks.life and https://DebBlum.com

The Parenting 3.0 Show is a weekly long-form discussion aimed at helping to make parenting more effective and enjoyable for parents and more beneficial for kids.

Self-Determination Theory - Part 3: Understanding Laziness

Self-Determination Theory - Part 3: Understanding Laziness

December 11, 2019

This week, Jai and Deb look at laziness through the lens of Self-determination Theory, revealing that it is often actually a form of amotivation - an inability to motivate - not a willful choice to remain inactive. Amotivation falls on the far end of the powerful Motivation Continuum offered by SDT, which we begin to explain. 

Links we mentioned (or should have) in this episode:

The Motivation Continuum 

Edward Deci - On Self-Determination Theory

Jessica Lahey - Teaching the Gift of Failure

Article - Laziness Does Not Exist

 

STAY CONNECTED WITH DEB & JAI:

Like the Parenting 3.0 Podcast Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/parenting3podcast/

And find them on their websites: https://LifeWorks.life and https://DebBlum.com

The Parenting 3.0 Show is a weekly long-form discussion aimed at helping to make parenting more effective and enjoyable for parents and more beneficial for kids.

Self-Determination Theory - Part 2: How To Get Ourselves and Our Kids to Do Things

Self-Determination Theory - Part 2: How To Get Ourselves and Our Kids to Do Things

December 4, 2019

In this episode, Jai and Deb explore motivation, starting with the search for a "silver bullet" strategy for motivating oneself to go to the gym. During this episode, we also explore the relationship between autonomy and self-actualization, and how both concepts are intimately related to motivation in general.   

STAY CONNECTED WITH DEB & JAI:
 
Like the Parenting 3.0 Podcast Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/parenting3podcast/
And find them on their websites: https://LifeWorks.life and https://DebBlum.com
 
The Parenting 3.0 Show is a weekly long-form discussion aimed at helping to make parenting more effective and enjoyable for parents and more beneficial for kids.
Self-Determination Theory - Part 1: The Three Human Needs

Self-Determination Theory - Part 1: The Three Human Needs

November 27, 2019

This week, Jai and Deb explore three fundamental human psychological needs that, when met, lead to greater vitality, motivation and well-being and, when unmet, contribute to anxiety, depression and lowered of self-esteem. These needs, as articulated by Self-Determination Theory, are: relatedness, autonomy and competence. Join us as we discuss how to increase our own well-being and the well-being of our children.

Links we mentioned (or should have) in this episode:

STAY CONNECTED WITH DEB & JAI:

Like the Parenting 3.0 Podcast Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/parenting3podcast/

And find them on their websites: https://LifeWorks.life and https://DebBlum.com

The Parenting 3.0 Show is a weekly long-form discussion aimed at helping to make parenting more effective and enjoyable for parents and more beneficial for kids.

Understanding “Bad” Behavior

Understanding “Bad” Behavior

November 20, 2019

Jai and Deb talk about how to better understand so-called "bad" behavior so we can more skillfully deal with the triggers that inevitably accompany the challenge of parenting.

Among the many topics that they explore, Jai and Deb show how inquiring into the stories we tell ourselves about the ways our children behave can help us be both more effective and more peaceful.

In addition, they discuss the importance of understanding and working with our own nervous systems as well as how, by reimagining our role as parents, we can bring new levels of insight and sensitivity to our relationships with our children. 

Links we mentioned (or should have) in this episode:

STAY CONNECTED WITH DEB & JAI:

Like the Parenting 3.0 Podcast Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/parenting3podcast/

And find them on their websites: https://LifeWorks.life and https://DebBlum.com

 

The Parenting 3.0 Show is a weekly long-form discussion aimed at helping to make parenting more effective and enjoyable for parents and more beneficial for kids.

Attachment Theory - Part 4: Not Dominant, Not Permissive, the Loving Alpha

Attachment Theory - Part 4: Not Dominant, Not Permissive, the Loving Alpha

November 12, 2019

This week, Jai and Deb conclude their exploration of Attachment Theory, focusing this time on the Loving Alpha. 

What's the Loving Alpha? Well, it's not authoritarian or dominant style parenting and it's also not permissive. Think of it as something that is aligned with who we are and how we're meant to parent our children. Tune in to better understand what the alpha is and what it's not.

We also get into why adolescents seem so rebellious and how the Alpha can best relate to the more "demanding" child in order to prevent more problems in the future.  

At the end we discuss that we don’t need to be perfect - yes, we want to hit the mark as much as we can, but when we miss the mark, we can regulate ourselves and repair the rupture. 

Links we mentioned (or should have) in this episode:

STAY CONNECTED WITH DEB & JAI:

Like the Parenting 3.0 Podcast Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/parenting3podcast/

And find them on their websites: https://LifeWorks.life and https://DebBlum.com

The Parenting 3.0 Show is a weekly long-form discussion aimed at helping to make parenting more effective and enjoyable for parents and more beneficial for kids.

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